


Unravel

by MikaKagehjra



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Fluff, Friendship/Love, Gen, I didn't want to commit either way I just wanted cute okay, If You Squint - Freeform, M/M, hidekane
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-03-20 11:04:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3647943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MikaKagehjra/pseuds/MikaKagehjra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One night after returning from the 11th ward, Kaneki ends up on Hide's doorstep.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unravel

**Author's Note:**

> Basically this is how I coped with the Season 2 finale. Or tried to.

Kaneki didn't know how he ended up here. He wasn't exactly losing time—if he thought about it, he could remember every step that brought him closer to Hide's door. But he knew he shouldn't be here. He was putting Hide at risk, threatening the fragile safety he'd built up for him for so long. Hide was more important that any amount of loneliness suffered on his part. Yet still, his hand raised to knock.

In the few seconds after he knocked, Kaneki realized a few things. One, it was somewhere around two in the morning. Two, he was bloody, his clothes stained and ripped from the fight he'd just gotten out of. Three, he couldn't know if Hide even wanted to see him. It had been months; Hide would be completely justified in hating Kaneki for abandoning him. But Kaneki could hear movements on the other side of the door, and he knew there was no time to back out now. He combed his fingers through his hair, realizing too late that he probably just bloodied himself further, in his white hair where it would be starkly visible. Before he could think any more, the door was opening. Hide's hair was longer than it had been the last time Kaneki saw him, and his dark roots were visible. His eyes were bright and awake, despite the late hour. When he saw Kaneki, his eyes widened. He opened the door all the way, stepping backwards.

“Kaneki! Come in! You look like shit, can I get you coffee? And you oculd use a change of clothes, too—“ Hide paused, looking at Kaneki closely. “On second thought, you should probably shower.” He herded Kaneki to the bathroom, dropping a mismatched pair of black and yellow towels in his arms. “I'll leave you a change of clothes and have coffee ready when you're done.” He took a step away, presumably to find clothes, but stopped. Instead, he embraced Kaneki.

Kaneki opened his mouth to protest, to remind Hide of the grime and blood, but Hide spoke first. “I'm glad you came back.” And then he's gone.

Kaneki closed the bathroom door and turned on the shower, stripping off his ruined clothes. In the process, he caught sight of himself in the mirror and paused. He did indeed manage to get blood in his hair, but that wasn't what he was focused on.

His mask was hanging around his neck. And Hide had to have seen it, but he hadn't reacted. He showered quickly, trying not to think about what that meant.

When he exited, there were new clothes on the counter. His old clothes were gone, including his mask, and he could smell coffee. He dressed and followed the smell to find Hide in the kitchen, pouring out two cups of coffee. His mask was leering up at him from the counter, and he stopped in the door way, staring at it. Hide turned upon hearing his footsteps, holding a cup of black coffee and another with a much lighter color.

“You look better already.” Then, in a more jovial tone, “You shouldn't worry me like that. Rabbits can die of worry, you know!” He sat down at his kitchen table, setting the black cup of coffee across from him. Kaneki couldn't help but be drawn closer, even feeling a tiny smile on his face at having Hide joke.

“I'm sorry,” he murmured, wrapping one hand around his mug of coffee, letting the other rest on the table. Hide dimmed a little.

“The first words you say to me in months, an apology.” He smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. “I can't even be surprised. Everything is different, but nothing is.”

“You know.” The words were out of Kaneki's mouth without his permission, and he regretted them as soon as he said them. But they made Hide's smile a little softer.

“Yeah, I know, Mr. Eyepatch,” he replied, covering his eye with one hand as he did. “I knew even before you left—that's why I joined the CCG trying to look for you. I thought I could take advantage of their resources while redirecting them away from you at the same time.”

Kaneki felt tears at the back of his throat. Hide had done so much for him—derailed his entire life, and even put it in danger by betraying the CCG—and he had simply vanished without a word.

“I'm sorry—“

“Not again!” Hide was frowning. “You don't need to keep apologizing to me. You're back now.” His expression relaxed. “Just don't leave again. Rabbits—“

“Die if they're lonely, I know.” Kaneki paused. “We've both just been trying to protect each other. I've wasted so much time.” Then he remembered what happened to Kimi, and rethought that. It had been worth it for Hide to have been safe; he couldn't imagine what Aogiri would have done to Hide to get to Kaneki. He was startled out of his mind by the touch of a hand against his; Hide had reached across the table, and now held the hand that had been resting on the table with both of his. His eyes stared into Kaneki's so intently that for a moment he wondered if he'd let his eye shift subconsciously, but then he spoke.

“You're here now. The past year doesn't matter as long as we're together now.” He paused, letting his eyes fall. “You... are staying, right? You didn't come back just to leave without a word again? You'd come back for a reason, right?” When he was finished speaking, he found the courage to look back up at Kaneki.

“I didn't mean to come, exactly. I just... couldn't keep staying away, I guess. It was selfish—I shouldn't have come.” Hide's face fell, and in that instant Kaneki knew he couldn't cut him off again, safety be damned. “But now that I'm here, I don't think I could leave again, even if it is selfish.” Hide grinned, and even though Kaneki was unsure if he was making the right decision, he smiled back.

“Good. It was lonely without you.” Kaneki nodded.

“It was. In a way, I'm still glad you weren't there. I can't imagine what would have happened to you if you'd been around for some of the things that happened.” Hide had been around though, at least in the beginning. And it had nearly cost him his life, when Nishiki had attacked Hide in order to provoke Kaneki. His hand tightened around the mug and he felt the ceramic give between his fingers. Frowning, he glanced down and froze. He'd broken the handle off completely, and the way Kaneki held it, it looked almost like a finger bone. Disgusted at himself by being taken aback by something so small, Kaneki flung the small piece of ceramic away, distantly hearing it clink against the rest of the mug. Still, he couldn't help the involuntary compulsion to crack each of his fingers, first one knuckle and then the other, just to make sure they were all still there. As he cracked the last one, he realized Hide was staring at him. He looked angry, and Kaneki realized he'd broken one of Hide's cups for no reason.

“I'm sorry—“

“They hurt you.” 

“What?” Kaneki expected to be scolded, not faced with such a blunt statement.

“The people you were trying to protect me from. They hurt you.” Kaneki blinked at him, but saw little point in denying what Hide had so easily figured out. He was too observant; it's what made him dangerous, and what put him in danger. Kaneki stared down at the wooden grain of the table.

“Yes.” He hadn't expected to feel anything when he said it, but his throat dried up and his heart was pounding. The air around him suddenly felt too thick to fit in his lungs. He curled his toes in his shoes, flexed his hands, and counted. 1000, 993, 986, 979, 972, 965, 958, 951, 944, 937, 930, 923—

“Kaneki!” His lungs refilled in his shock at being pulled out of his mind, burning at the sudden sensation of being filled with air again, and he realized he'd been pushing on his index finger with his thumb while he counted. It didn't fit quite right into his hand; he'd pushed it slightly out of place, but when he let go, it moved back with a crack. Hide flinched across from him, his eyes wide like he'd just been hit. “You don't have to talk about it.” Hide picked up both coffee mugs, replacing Kaneki's with a new one and refilling both. He placed Kaneki's back in front of him. “Why don't we talk about something else?”

Kaneki stared down at his new mug. This one was black—no doubt thanks to Hide's fantastic observational skills—and it had a cartoon character painted on the side. “I'm not sure I remember how to make small talk.” Hide smiled at him, somehow a gesture more of understanding than happiness.

“What about what happened before you came here tonight? If that's off-limits too, we can just play some video games—nothing too violent, maybe Mario Kart.”

“No, what happened tonight isn't related to me getting hurt. The blood wasn't mine. I found some ghouls skulking around down the block, and they thought I was trying to keep them from hunting on my territory, figured with the group of them they'd be able to take me out easily. They must've been new to the area—everyone who's from around here has learned already that this is no one's hunting ground.”

Hide blinked at Kaneki. “You fought other ghouls to keep them away from my building?” By hearing Hide say it out loud, Kaneki realized how weird that must sound.

“Well, I do fight a lot of other ghouls... but that's why I fought these ghouls in particular, yes.”

Hide grinned. “Aw, you do care about me.”

“I already said I do, didn't I? I'm not going to stay away to keep you safe from ghouls that might know me only to let some random ghoul attack you while I'm gone.”

There was a long pause while Hide and Kaneki just stared at each other, Hide smiling, Kaneki barely suppressing a blush. Then, Hide spoke. “I'm glad you're home.” The moment persisted for a bit longer, and then Hide stood. “C'mon, it's been ages since I've had the chance to beat you at Mario Kart. Let's see if your hand-eye coordination has improved any.”

“I can promise it has, but I can't promise anything about my driving skills.” Hide laughed, and warmth spread through Kaneki's chest. He was sure he was about to lose miserably, but even that felt good. He was allowed to lose here, where nothing was at stake (except for maybe his pride, but what was that compared to Hide's joy?).

“How about a bet?” Or maybe something would be at stake. “If I win, you stay here tonight—I'll set up the pull-out for you. And if you win, you can pick something.” But of course with Hide, Kaneki knew he would never be asked for something he didn't want to give.

“If I win...” Kaneki thought very carefully about what he would ask of Hide. “We'll go to our burger place for lunch tomorrow.”

“I don't understand how that benefits you; you don't even eat burgers.”

“But I get to choose, and that's what I choose.” He missed getting burgers with Hide; even if he couldn't taste them the way he used to, he could still enjoy being there with his best friend.

“Suit yourself. How about Special Cup, winner-takes-all?” Hide was already picking up the controller, scrolling through the characters. Like always, he picked baby Mario and Luigi, in the green carriage-kart.

Kaneki felt like he might start crying. “That sounds perfect.”


End file.
